Sunday, September 8, 2013

Love your own Man

  Did you ever buy something and then look at your neighbors to see if yours was good enough?

  We bought a different van recently. After pouring over Craig's list for weeks, and making a couple dry runs, we went through several turns and bends in the road.Maybe we should spend more so we could get a better one. Everything we looked at was so rusty and used beyond where we wanted to go. Maybe we were expecting too much for the money.We finally decided we were not going for more money. We would use what God gave us and trust him for the right van.

  A couple days later we were sitting in the van we knew was right for us. The price was right, it drove great and the interior was beautiful.It did have some rust. So now we have our van and I thank God for it. But I find myself still looking as I drive past dealerships. Is there a van still out there that can beat ours?

  There is a certain amount of us females out there that treat our man like that. Is there a better one out there?

  I'd like to challenge us women to STOP THAT!

  Be content with your man!.......There is a lot of potential in your man. If you can stop trying to conform him into the image you have in your mind. Let him be who he is, and LOVE HIM! There is a 99% chance that you will be surprised beyond your dreams. The man you are looking for is the man you married to begin with.God created men to be in charge and women to be their helpers. When we woman start questioning and thinking that we have the answers and our ideas would work a whole lot better, or we feel like we are spiritually ahead, then we are no longer filling our God given role as helper and most of the time we put our men in shut down mode, because they were not created to be our helper. When we take leadership, chances are our men won't and then they aren't filling their role but neither are we.

  God's word says we need to be taught to love our man. which means it doesn't come automatically. We all mess up, but we need to do it.The Greek word for love in Titus 2, where it says we need to be taught to love our husbands, means a friendship love. So we need to be their friend!

   We all have our hopes and dreams and are so hurt when they don't happen, and we think our husband are such jerks! But the truth is, what we really want, we really can have. If we just LOVE OUR MAN!

  I don't know if one size fits all or not, but I will tell you bits and pieces of my story. But before I go on , let me say first that you really need to connect with God. God is the only one that knows what steps you need to take that are unique to your situation.But I will share with you the steps he led me through.

  The first step was I had to stop trying to change him and make him into someone he isn't.I had this way of measuring him up against some men that I had on a higher more "godly" plateau. I repented before God and then I went to my man and I told him I was sorry. I told him that from that day forward I was going to let him be himself. We were both relieved. Whew! What a relief, I didn't have to constantly try to make other people think he was exactly what I or they wanted him to be. I was so tremendously freed, and I was excited to see who he really was! The thing that gave me the most peace was that I knew God wanted me to release him from my expectations and I knew that God would take charge.I found it wasn't my job to conform him into any image.That is what God does, and he conforms him into the image of Christ.

   The next thing I learned was to smile at him. A LOT! I learned that your man loves your smile. Okay, so now I just took a lot of pressure off my man and I am smiling at him a lot! How is he going to react to that? He is going to LOVE ME! That is exactly what happened! He loves me! He calls me a jewel. He tells me not only privately but also publicly that I am the best woman in the world for him. That makes me feel special. It fills that spot in my heart that is meant just for him and it spills over with joy. It fills me up with delight makes me feel like dancing!

  That kind of relationship is so much more valuable to me than having my own way and getting things going just the way I expect them to. Because God did not create me to be the head cheese. He created me to be the helper of my man. That doesn't mean that he doesn't listen to my ideas. The truth is he is much more open to my ideas because I am on his team.

  Let me warn you though, every man has his "no fly zone". If you find yourself flying into that zone, pull the rudder hard and bank out of there as fast as you can.

  Josh Turner sings a song, Will you go with me girl?,I don't know the motivation behind that song, but when I apply it through the eyes of a man with his wife it really has a message. He talks about her commitment to him, and asks a question that I think every man really wants to know of his wife. Will you go with me, even if I don't know where I am going?

  That was one more concept that I had to get into me head and heart. Taught to me by God himself, through his Holy Spirit and with the help of some human teachers! Thank God for some of those faithful ones! I needed to learn and apply the fact that I would love my husband through anything he leads me through.Even if he makes wrong moves and mistakes that end up taking us through painful events. That love was applied to my heart by God himself. I love my husband. And yes, we have crashed, more than once. But God always picks us up again and gives us grace and strength and the power to go on. God has also given me the greatest gift I ever could have found through the lessons learned and one of the "crashes" we went through.Because of his work in my husband's heart and he in turn taught to me. But that is a story for another time....

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